![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg5YzlN-y9y03cXRoKk583NBxNWZojjyk3vomK25rVEYiIrD-iUKjIg2wbsq95WRVm7bi4dyvWsQtLqgwhFLA2q9lKhh0S3FMJbsV2eiRixzN7h5DQO4sX6Ug2thnHfcOXS78Q-7l0mmg/s320/times_caf.jpg)
I did a little research and discovered that if you work at Google's California campus "Googleplex," you could:
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiodbKy_3eVjC04BAZhCVdgRUK0-_LxlkNVpGBnUKNGtp-vzWFVroWmHa-WumvszaSLX6EwVUaC8NG6YcaNSSAGQfy_C6GrHQD0pA0WK287LRqUEU0kDDXhkPVdwQdvSVF3sLT6kclXiXQ/s320/google1_lg.jpg)
Enjoy daily "foodles," an daily email sent to educate employees about fun food facts and healthy eating, eat free breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks and pick up prepackaged foods for weekend meals.
Shop at an onsite famers' market, get a check-up, get a hair-cut, take a swim, do your laundry, play volleyball, get your bike repaired, get free rides on company shuttle buses, gawk at a dinosaur, pee atop a heated Japanese toilet seat, keep a lava lamp on your desk, bring your dog to work, receive $8,000 a year in tuition reimbursement, and, this is by far the creepiest, receive $5,000 toward adoption assistance.
I know it sounds nice, but wouldn't you have to be lobotomized to really enjoy it? First off, although the management obviously values their employees, all of these perks still constitute entrapment. If you can get a free lunch, you won't spend an hour off campus. You'll stay later if you don't have to go home to walk your dog or pick up your dry cleaning. If they buy you an adopted Chinese baby, you pretty much owe them, big time for all of eternity. And what kind of Kool-Aid must you be drinking to sustain such a cultish existence?
But, on the other hand, I've always liked the taste of Kool-Aid. (I wasn't allowed to drink it as a child (red dye no. 3), and I'm still inexplicably drawn to it.) Me being Chinese and all, I know how to meld myself into the faceless mass. Perhaps the fresh Mountain View air would do me good. And I'd like to adopt a Chinese baby some day. I checked the Goggle job board and found myself to be woefully underqualified for any of the current openings, but perhaps I'll check back later. There's something to be said for free lunch, even if it's not really free.
1 comment:
My dad has that heated Japanese toilet seat (of course). It's AWESOME.
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