Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Mass hysteria ends in uncomfortable butt rubbing


The MTA was crippled by a severe early morning thunderstorm, which meant that everyone was freaking out. There's nothing like a horde of New Yorkers freaking out, especially in the summer when there are already lots of disturbing odors in the air.

I, ever practical, listened to three radio programs and watched my ghetto cable news channel (where all of the anchors have lisps and unusually large ear lobes), to try to get a sense of which trains were out of commission, but to no avail. There were conflicting reports all around. Instead, I had to hit the streets for my news, and that didn't get me very far. There were about 50 people standing in front of my building, gawking at a woman being carted away by paramedics (connection to the subway disaster unclear). I heard snippets of "a tree fell on the track," "no trains," "buses slow," more often than not modified with descriptors like "fuck" and "bullshit." Eventually I was approached by my unsavory neighbor (who I generally avoid since he creeped me out with a long story about having to buy midnight milkshakes for his girlfriend "at that time of the month," wink wink). He said the trains were now running slow, but running nonetheless.

What the fuck MTA? Can we get some communication up in here? I understand that this is an abnormal situation, that workers are stressed, that you're doing the best they can. But if this is acceptable, what's going to happen when a tsunami hits us and the streets freeze over? Or when a Godzilla-like monster crawls out of the sea and starts eating people? Or how about when a blackout hits the entire city and disables trains, trapping riders underground, forcing people to walk miles to get home, or even sleep out on the streets. Or, hmmm... terrorists fly a plane into some buildings? (BTW, figure out which of the above scenarios are real vs movie plots and you'll win a prize.)

MTA, if you can't give people timely information about service changes after a three hour rainstorm, what can you do?

Anyway, I ended up making it into Manhattan on the train, but I had to ride butt to butt with a fat guy, then walk the last 20 minutes. Let's hope my day improves from there.

2 comments:

Russ said...

Chalk this one up as an example of Good Atlanta. I got into my car in my nice cool garage, rode to work in my nice cool car, and 10 minutes later parked in my nice cool underground parking garage. It's 100 degrees here today. I know I am celebrating an environmentally unsound existence, but days like today, it is pretty damn sweet.

therefereeblows said...

dearest r2b2, you sound shocked and amazed,when i think you mean to be exasperated,MTA?, Maybe Trains Arrive?Mostly Tired and Annoyed?Mass Tedium for All?,my sympathy's are with you and all other passengers ,you cant run America on a shoestring and that goes tenfold for the MTA,good luck and stay cool